Thursday, February 14, 2013

Stop growing, would ya?!

My kids are growing too fast, WAY too fast.  Especially Taylor. 

This past December, Taylor was just barely shy of my height, just barely.  And since then he's grown about two inches and has well surpassed his mother.  His voice is constantly cracking, he's in size 11 shoes, and last week he asked me to teach him how to shave the shadow of a mustache on his upper lip (to which I quickly referred him to ask his father. . . like I've ever shaved my upper lip before). 

He eats a massive breakfast, then a massive lunch, then a massive after school snack that resembles Thanksgiving, then another big dinner and constant snacking until bedtime.  After school, he always has a mouthful to tell about who likes who, what social rumors were spread around school, who tried to flirt with him, which girls are nice, and which other girls are "NICE". . .

When he was little, he was very physically demanding, as all little children are.  Now he does everything (but drive) by himself.  He takes care of his own hygiene, he does his own laundry and keeps  track of his own things, cleans his own room, and does his own chores without any help from me.  He is pretty independent and responsible.

But he has become much more emotionally demanding, as most teenagers do.  I need to be at the crossroads. When he comes home from one activity and leaves to another, I need to be there asking questions, giving counsel, complimenting, and showing love.  I need to be "all ears" when he's in the mood to talk, even when there are  a million things on my to-do list.  I need to make eye contact and show him that I'm interested in his life, in his feelings, in his friends, in his activities. 

As demanding as it is, I absolutely love it.  I love when he wants to tell me about his day, I love when he wants to invite friends over to "hang out", I love preparing good food for him, knowing that he'll love and appreciate it.  I love watching him lead out in social settings, sports, and church activities. 

There are bumps in the road.  There have been plenty of emotions-up and down, up and down.  And I'm learning that he'll occasionally ride that emotional roller coaster, but my job is to not ride it with him. My job is to be there when he gets off, to be a constant in his life, to uplift and compliment when he's struggling about an issue, to let him hold the reins and make a lot of decisions on his own, then to live out the natural consequences of those decisions.  My job is to be a mentor, and a friend.
And as difficult as it is sometimes, I wouldn't have it any other way.  I am learning how to be more patient, how to communicate effectively, how to let go of control, and how to love more deeply.

As my children are growing and developing, my role as Mother is morphing, changing, and developing as well.  And I wouldn't have it any other way!  Cheers to raising teenagers!

1 comment:

  1. What a nice post. Taylor sure is turning into a great young man. I love your comment "I'm learning that he'll occasionally ride that emotional roller coaster, but my job is to not ride it with him." I needed that reminder because I often get emtional when my kids are and that is the wrong thing to do. Thanks!